DMOZ Editor Corruption Shock

We interrupt this blog to bring you the latest news from the Open Directory Project, where thousands of volunteers from all over the world spend their own time helping to make the internet a little more useable.

Or so they claim.

But in news just to hand, it appears that all these so-called "editors" are actually engaged in a systematic attempt to undermine civilisation as we know it!

So who are these "editors", exactly?

Masquerading as slightly obsessed and order-loving hobbyists, they meet in darkened forums and pass secret messages to each other using codenames and an indecipherable language, including arcane words such as "catmv", "reorg", "keditall" and "meta". This last term used to carry all sorts of fearful connotations, calling up images of big sticks, slashed permissions, and super-secret cabals.

But bureaucracy has extended its grip even into the subterranean caverns of DMOZ, and metas are now no more awesome than the average middle manager. Instead, a new overclass has emerged in recent years ... the all-seeing, all-knowing, all-powerful Admin, although for reasons which are poorly understood, they seem to have some sort of inbuilt regulatory system which continuously limits their numbers, regardless of new additions.

OK, so what's all this "corruption" about?

Well, this is the really scary part ... nobody actually seems to know for sure, but it definitely happens. A lot!

Oh yes, it does, because lots of people say it does, and they wouldn't lie, would they?

Besides, you can read it all over the internet, which is further proof that it must be true!

According to these "reliable sources", most editors are getting paid by webmasters who are understandably anxious to have their sites included in this prestigious directory, even though the DMOZ Social Contract promises that there will never be any charge.

All these corrupt editors are apparently making an absolute fortune by selling something which is actually free, and what's more they are managing to do it without ever being caught!

Hundreds and hundreds of them!

For years and years!

Hang on, that doesn't sound possible!
Well no, you are quite right. Of course it's not possible.

For a start, there are strict guidelines about editorial Conflict of Interest, and any volunteer found to be requesting or accepting payment will instantly and permanently lose their account. One bribe, and you're out. No second chances.

Secondly, any webmaster who tries to bribe an editor risks having all his sites permanently banned from listing in the directory - hardly worth the risk of even trying to pay for something which is already free.

Thirdly, there is a prominent link on every DMOZ category page called "Report Abuse", so that anyone can report any breach of the ODP policies and guidelines (with the necessary evidence, of course). Needless to say, the people so stridently claiming abuse never have enough evidence to submit such a report.

Fourthly, many of the more experienced editors have excellent detective skills and a passion for finding the occasional "bad egg" that inevitably shows up in a large community.

And finally, it is clear that some of the more hysterical and slanderous claims made about widespread DMOZ corruption come from the following groups:

• former editors who have previously lost their own accounts due to abusing their positions
• webmasters who have tried and failed to bribe an editor, and who are therefore bitterly disappointed
• owners of websites which do not meet the criteria for listing and therefore blame DMOZ for having high standards.

A credible bunch, to be sure. They probably have some unclaimed lottery winnings they'd like to discuss with you too.

ADDED in March 2011: Before you click the Comment button, please read this post. Thank you.

Swine Flu

It's not original, but I love it.

Media frenzy is naturally way ahead of sensible information, as usual, so I appreciated this photograph demonstrating "Swine Flu Transmission".

For those who are interested in factual information on the problem, please see this collection of reliable sites.

A DMOZ/ODP Fairytale

Let's start with a nursery rhyme.

Does everyone remember this mindless but catchy children's song? Then sing along:

Ten green bottles, hanging on the wall

Ten green bottles, hanging on the wall

But if one green bottle should accidentally fall

There'd be nine green bottles, hanging on the wall

and so on.

[ BTW I learned from Wikipedia (of which more anon) that apparently this is the English version, with the Americans (naturally ;-) ) going bigger and better with "99 bottles of beer". ]

Warning: Star Wars allegory alert.

A long time ago, in an Open Directory Project far, far away, the DMOZ Emperor decreed that nine of his most loyal and experienced startroopers should become "Volunteer Administrators", and he gave them special powers to rule the rest of his Empire.

For a couple of months everything continued much as before.

But then strange things started to happen behind the forcefield hiding the Admins from the community: one by one, they started to disappear! The first one to go simply vanished suddenly, without a word.

Soon afterwards another started drifting away, making occasional ghostly appearances which grew farther and farther apart until all that remained was his toolbox, glowing gently.

Seven green Admins.

The next departure was the most admirable, because of all the remaining Admins this person was the only one who took their guidelines seriously:

"Actively participate in the functioning of the Admin group. In addition, administrators should be visible in discussion forums and editing activities. If time constraints do not allow an active level of participation for an extended period of time, the individual is expected to resign from their Admin privileges."

Six green Admins.

All Admin discussions are secret, so nobody really knows what happened next, but over the next year or so there were fewer and fewer sightings. Rumours abounded, of course, and one Admin was even thought to have run away and joined the circus! Two more were simply assumed to have discovered that life outside the Empire was more appealing.

Down to three green Admins.

So for another year or so, the directory was managed by just one-third of the original group, although except for the one mentioned above, the others all retained their special powers, and would swoop in unexpectedly from time to time, to ensure they were not forgotten.

Not surprisingly, this lack of effective leadership meant the whole of DMOZ started to lose its way. A great many experienced editors left, and a cloud of gloom and despondency settled over ODP-land.

News of all this eventually reached the Emperor, who made one of his rare appearances to announce that he had chosen seven more of his most loyal startroopers to become Admins.

Ten green Admins!

There was much rejoicing at this indication that he still cared for the directory. Now the community would regain its lost energy! The editors would have direction and strong leadership! DMOZ would triumph once more!

Hurrah!!

But almost immediately, unexplained things started to happen once more, out of sight in Admin-land.

Two of the remaining original group soon vanished (while still retaining their powers of course), but one of the new Admins decided to relinquish the super-powers.

And then the only still-active member of the original group resigned altogether.

Back to six green Admins (uh oh, here we go again).

Of those six, only four have been seen in the community often enough to be well-known, and now one of those has recently resigned.

So out of 16 people specially chosen by the Emperor to manage DMOZ, we are left with

4 invisible and inactive Admins,

2 invisible but apparently active ones, leaving

just 3 who are effectively fulfilling their roles.

I certainly hope this is not

~~~ THE END ~~~

But then, all this is just a fairy tale, so perhaps all is well and there's a happy ending after all!